Bridal Lessons - Chapter 70
The invasion by Ruslan, a neighboring enemy country, was the battle in which he struggled the most. The disparity in power was evident to everyone.
So, Iscarion had no choice but to prepare for the worst. He had to consider a future he desperately didn’t want to imagine, where he might be gone and Rosen would be left alone once again.
“That letter was like a will. You were still very young then, and if something happened to me, I had to make sure you were entrusted to someone reliable. Even if I left my assets to you, I couldn’t be certain of what would happen, so I needed to ensure you had a place to go.”
“I see…”
Even though he was quite young himself, he had thought that far ahead. Everyone has only one life. On the eve of heading to a battlefield where life and death were uncertain, he had written a letter entrusting someone with his own safety, knowing it might be his last will. This realization made her heart ache.
Sensing her unspoken feelings, Iscarion spoke softly.
“It was just a precaution. It wasn’t as serious as it sounds. I had no intention of dying and leaving you alone. ”
He gently patted her small shoulder to comfort her.
“The wedding is in a week. Rosen, I know what you’re worried about… but everyone thinks you’re just undergoing bridal lessons, so you don’t have to worry.”
“Bridal lessons? Oh, so that’s why…”
Only then did Rosen understand the overly respectful attitude of the butler and maids towards her recently. She had thought they were keeping their distance because she was leaving soon and had felt hurt by it.
The fact that they believed she was undergoing bridal lessons meant they saw her as almost the Grand Duchess already, which made them unable to treat her casually.
“Of course, I know the content was a problem. It wasn’t typical bridal education… But honestly, when you said you wanted to leave, I wasn’t in my right mind.”
“……”
“I was terrified I’d lose you if I didn’t do that. Please understand my feelings, okay?”
“Understand…?”
Rosen silently looked at Iscarion. His usually composed blue eyes were now filled with an unusual anxiety.
Suddenly, she recalled the time when she thought she was the only one in a one-sided love. She had been hyper-aware of everything he said and did, reacting to his every move.
She had thought she was the only one affected like a buoy in the water, but now she realized that Iscarion was also shaken because of her. This realization made her feel strangely good yet odd.
She also recognized the strange feeling rising from deep within her chest.
In a situation where the person she trusted most had suddenly changed, she was afraid.
During her confinement in the separate residence, Iscarion had done all sorts of things to her. Forced intercourse, stripping her for punishment outdoors, repeatedly putting her in humiliating situations and making her cry, and even inserting a humiliating plug in her intimate place to try and impregnate her quickly…
To him, pregnancy might have just been a means to keep her tied to him, but Rosen was genuinely scared.
She didn’t want to bring a child into the world under such circumstances and knew how coldly the world viewed women who bore illegitimate children for married men.
But now that the misunderstanding was cleared up, he wanted forgiveness and acceptance?
Did he think she could forget everything and be happy just walking down the aisle?
This was anger. Anger at him for not trying to win her heart properly, using her feelings and the serious situation of pregnancy to keep her by his side. Anger at him for changing suddenly and terrifying her, the only family she thought she had.
“I will be a good husband to you. I’ll always look at you, love you, cherish you…”
“Brother, that’s a given.”
“What?”
Rosen cut him off firmly.
“The process was wrong. If you truly respected me and wanted to win my heart, you shouldn’t have tried to trap me like that.”
“That was a mistake. I told you, I was desperate not to lose you, no matter what.”
“Do you think trying to forcibly get me pregnant is a mistake that can be forgiven with a single word? Do you still see me as the little girl who used to read fairy tales with you?”
“No, that’s not it, Rosie. I truly… I love you.”
Iscarion looked like a man standing alone under a collapsing world. Rosen added with a clear voice.
“Isn’t it strange to do those things and expect love in return?”
Rosen gently released the hand he was holding desperately.
“I… I don’t know.”
A silence as deep as the emotional chasm between them stretched out. Though they were only a hand’s breadth apart, their hearts felt more distant than ever.
