Come and Cry at My Funeral - Chapter 6
But for a brief moment, a flutter of excitement flickered within her like a fragile candle flame.
‘Is he going to kiss me?’
The tip of his thumb was very close to her lips.
If she dared to stick out her tongue even slightly, they would touch.
Regardless of it being a night of twisted pleasure for the emperor’s enjoyment… it almost felt like the start of something more.
But his fingers soon trailed down from her lips, lightly brushing her neck where the hair fluttered and gently touched her trembling shoulders.
Warmth spread wherever he touched, awakening a sense of sensation she felt for the first time in her life, making the fine hairs on her skin stand on end. She could feel the tips of her b*****s stiffen, an awareness she had rarely paid attention to.
When his hand lightly gripped her waist, an unfamiliar tingling sensation arose between her legs, like being tickled with a feather, then teasingly tormented in a place too shameful to speak of. Her breath hitched.
“Ah.”
Realizing her reaction, she suddenly felt so embarrassed she wanted to escape his touch.
How could she react so strongly to just a little touch?
As if she had been longing for physical intimacy all her life.
“Come closer.”
But at Izar’s low voice, her retreating body froze. Unlike her, filled with tension, shyness, and embarrassment, her husband’s expression was unspeakably conflicted.
“We can’t delay this any longer.”
“…Yes.”
Her trembling thighs gradually calmed down.
Right. He truly didn’t anticipate anything from her, not even the slightest bit. She felt foolish for being deceived by the heat building up within her.
Didn’t she already know how much he hated being forced? How much he despised having a bastard as a wife?
‘I should at least spare him the trouble of undressing me.’
With a heavy heart, Freesia loosened the white ribbon fastening the front of her chemise. The top of the white chemise silently slid down over Izar’s hand on her waist.
Being a noblewoman for three years, she looked better than during her days as an emaciated shepherdess. Though her figure might be modest compared to her half-sister Atria, who was said to have a body like a celestial sculpture.
‘Even if it’s not worth being exposed before him.’
He showed no sign of excitement, and on the other hand, she didn’t know how to act. She forcibly stopped her instinctive attempt to cover her bare chest.
The silence in the room grew denser, and only his low breathing could be heard overhead.
Unable to face the disappointment she imagined in his eyes, Freesia deliberately avoided looking up.
“I’m ready.”
“…….”
“I’ll do my best… to fulfill my duties tonight.”
“Duties?”
The short question, tinged with evident displeasure, made it clear that Izar found the situation somewhat amusing or disdainful.
A virtuous wife was expected to spread her legs at her husband’s command and bear his seed, a duty that Freesia had heard various sordid tales about, but the essence of the matter didn’t seem too complicated.
“Yes, the duty of the bedchamber.”
Freesia now could reply with a composed voice. Since he didn’t desire her anyway, what was the point of showing shyness or clumsy coquetry?
“There’s no need for you to trouble yourself, just do as you please.”
And so, her chemise slid down, forming a circle on the floor.
But where was he looking now?
His gaze seemed fixed on her calves, particularly.
‘Ah.’
A wave of shame hit Freesia, and she almost stumbled backward.
How could she have been so foolish as to forget?
Due to years of beatings, her calves were covered in long, shiny scars.
Izar inhaled sharply, a sound that was probably a reaction to the sight. Scars like those on a woman’s body must have looked so grotesque to him.
He remained silent for a long time, and when he finally spoke, it was with a bitter laugh.
“Yes, a duty.”
The palm on her back pressed harder, its warmth contrasting starkly with his sarcastic tone.
“Our relationship will end with this.”
The sensation was like a brand searing her skin.
***
As Freesia suggested and he consented, they proceeded with their ‘duty’.
Staring at the dim canopy ceiling, Freesia gasped softly.
“Haa, ngh.”
The large hand spreading her thighs caused her hips to buck uncontrollably. His pants had long been discarded on the floor, but Freesia couldn’t muster the courage to look directly at him.
She had never seen a man’s g******s before, and the sight of his thick, vein-lined member was intimidating.
‘I’m scared.’
Despite several times when Izar parted her entrance and touched the area where the strange sensations had begun, she remained dry.
The pleasurable sensations she once heard about were overshadowed by her fear of the unknown.
“…It’s going to be difficult like this.”
Swallowing her fear at Izar’s clicking tongue, Freesia tried to calm herself.
“No, it’s fine.”
“You’re lying.”
“Really, it’s true. Just continue— Uht!”
Her urging was ignored.
Only after he persistently rubbed and slowly opened the split could any attempt be made.
She barely managed to accept his finger, but as the thick head pressed in, Freesia nearly choked on a strangled moan.
Her unaccustomed inner walls screamed silently under the brute invasion, feeling as if it was being seared with a hot iron every second.
“Uhp, nngh.”
Before she could let out a scream, Freesia bit her lip hard.
‘It hurts. It hurts so much.’
She wanted to weep from the pain.
Her fingers, gripping the sheets, were now scratching them in a futile attempt to endure.
‘But if I say it hurts now, will he stop?’
And Izar would never touch her again. Then, she might as well endure this pain. After all, she was no stranger to physical suffering.
However, when he leaned over her, his breath on her skin momentarily made her forget the excruciating pain between her legs.
His lips barely touching her ear made her spine involuntarily arch off the bed.
“Relax more.”
“Uh, but, ah!”
The moment Izar’s hand brushed her lower abdomen, Freesia let out a startled moan at the sight of their joined parts.
Not even half of her husband had entered her.
As he pressed down Freesia’s shoulders onto the bed, Izar whispered with a low voice.
“Relaxing will make it easier.”
“Ah, ah…!”
“This act ends only when I can move inside you.”
