Emperor's Alternate - Chapter 68
The palace was in turmoil due to the death of the princess. Coupled with the fact that Lecan survived the volcanic explosion while capturing Drakeshine, people cheered for this tragic romance.
Like any legendary lover who ended up committing suicide due to family disapproval, Lecan was being portrayed as the perfect prince in his narrative with the princess. Even the ‘neutrals’ who had been brought back from the dead by Lecan’s return were unable to rebel against the pomp and circumstance of the princess’s funeral.
‘Was I the first to notice the death of the princess?’
I didn’t attend the funeral. I was contemplating the title of the dukedom that I would quietly bestow upon Lecan. I stayed with Lucian for his ‘mana therapy’ which was scheduled to last for a month. I didn’t return to the palace until the day after it was all over.
I lay on the sofa, using it as a bed, staring at the geometric patterns on the ceiling. Lucian, who had been quiet the entire time, perhaps fearful of interrupting my thoughts, suddenly broke the silence.
“Sister.”
“…Yes.”
“What is your first memory? You’ve asked me about my first memory, but you haven’t shared yours.”
My first memory. I remained expressionless, still not taking my eyes off the ceiling. The bright daylight streamed in through the window. Perhaps because I hadn’t been too focused on work today, I didn’t feel immediately tired.
“In my first memory, I think I was out in some garden.”
“…Mhmm.”
“I don’t know how old I was. Just very young. My field of vision was very low.”
Lucian listened to my voice, smiling faintly like he was hearing a funny story.
“I think I was with our parents or our brothers. I approached my fiancé, who was reading a book from a distance. The sunlight was bright, but there seemed to be some shade there… I only remember a few words from the conversation we had.”
“What was the conversation about?”
“We were talking about the future, ten years from now.”
I blinked.
“I was young back then. I thought that after ten years, I would become a really cool, smart, and beautiful person. That’s all I said. My fiancé seemed to be annoyed by all the noise. He told me he wouldn’t be back for 10 years, so I made those bold statements like I was declaring an immature pipe dream. I thought to myself that when I saw him again, I would have kept my promise.”
“…Then, sister, you did keep your promise.”
I slowly turned my head to look at Lucian, who was leaning back on the bed, looking at me through the covers.
“Because you are as beautiful, wise, and wonderful as you are.”
“I’m not cool in the slightest.”
“Didn’t you tell me that self-deprecation isn’t helpful in the slightest in moving forward in life?”
“That’s because you…. keep telling me that sick people are useless.”
“You are such a shining light. It’s dazzling.”
“I hate the sun. I hate anything bright. I don’t even want to shine. I’d rather be in the shadows, where no one pays attention to me.”
“No, sister, you’re no shadow.”
I am merely a shadow behind Teiles II, meant to make him shine brighter. That was how I saw myself, but Lucian was ready to affirm me again and again.
“The sun suits you, sister. Whenever I see your brilliant golden hair, I think to myself that you are indeed like the sun, for even when you are still, your presence is palpable and you light up your surroundings.”
“…I’d rather stay out of everyone’s way and just hide in the shadows, as long as you’re alive.”
Lucian shook his head.
“…”
Normally, I would have found such conversations uncomfortable and headed straight to work. However, for some reason, I didn’t feel motivated to work.
I had been like this since the moment I saw that Lecan was alive. Tears suddenly streamed down my cheeks, but there was nothing particularly surprising about it. I always used to cry out of the blue for a few days after witnessing Lucian’s ‘mana therapy.’
I turned my head. Shedding tears didn’t make my voice tremble.
“I met my fiancé again. Naturally, he didn’t recognize me. When we reunited, he was radiant, and I was miserable. The young me who made grand promises, where did that person go? My fiancé, who rose higher than anyone, sparkled brightly. I felt like I had become something lurking in the depths of the sea, where even if I swam and struggled, the sunlight wouldn’t reach. A deep and deep abyss where even the sunlight hardly penetrates.”
It was a bleak experience.
“I didn’t have any sense of pride left. Before seeing him again, I didn’t even realize that I had forgotten what it meant to respect myself. It felt like going back to my younger self, but I couldn’t even put a name to those feelings.”
The sunlight felt warm. My skin tingled.
“Too long suppressed, it felt like my emotions hit rock bottom. I couldn’t tell if I was worried, jealous, compassionate, or longing. Or maybe…”
I trailed off. I didn’t think I should continue.
“Sister.”
“Lucian.”
My body slackened. The sunlight streaming in through the window made me wonder if I should sleep like this.
“For me, all these emotions are a luxury,” I said.
That was the only thing I knew for sure.
“All I need to do is protect you.”
I must have fallen asleep.
***
“It’s been bothering me, and this might be my chance to get rid of the rotten roots.”
“My Lord!”
The librarian recoiled at Lecan’s words. It was evident to everyone that the Emperor’s attack on the ‘neutral’ nobles had a clear political motive. Even if false accusations were not concocted, Lecan’s followers suffered unjustly because of his actions.
“No matter what you say, my lord, they took things too far.”
Lecan continued his training, swinging his sword as if he heard nothing.
“If a new nation is established, those who served will be honored, and those who made mistakes in the past will be pardoned.”
“…Ark!”
Lecan called out the advisor’s real name, which he rarely used. With a furious look on his face, Lecan thrust his sword and pointed it to the librarian’s neck. A slight movement of the sword, and his advisor would have been killed on the spot.
“You dare to try to turn me into a traitor.”
Despite the boiling anger in Lecan’s eyes, the advisor stood his ground. He had retreated enough and waited patiently. He trusted Lecan’s words that it was not the right time, even in the face of the previous Emperor’s suspicious death. But until when? Until when would he continue to turn a blind eye?
“This is the way of the world—history and the people have chosen! There is no other course but to accept.”
