Guidelines for the Perfect Goodbye - Chapter 98
Cecilia steadfastly handed a plate to Mary, who was standing and eating, and gave her a fork.
“Can… can I sit here?”
“Yeah. It’s annoying to hand-feed you. Just eat on your own.”
“Miss…”
Mary asked with moved eyes.
“Aren’t you going to eat?”
“I’m not hungry.”
“But you barely ate at mealtime…”
Mary pinched her fingers like tongs and spoke.
“If you don’t like sweets, should I ask them to make a sandwich?”
“No, I’m fine.”
Cecilia was a good eater despite her small and slender stature. She generally loved gourmet food.
But today, nothing seemed appetizing.
‘Maybe because I’ve been running around all day…’
Or maybe it was the emotional drain from dealing with Diana.
Or maybe…
‘It could be because I’m drained from dance practice this afternoon.’
The thought of dancing made her already low spirits sink through the floor.
Ever since Cecilia faked that bloody foot injury, Caroline hadn’t stepped on Cecilia’s feet. But she wasn’t particularly cooperative either.
She deliberately danced poorly, missing the beat multiple times. Thanks to that, Cecilia’s already poor dance skills had been stagnant for a long time.
‘There’s no point in learning this way.’
It was tricky to find another teacher without fully clearing Louise of the suspicions, nor did she have the authority to do so.
‘If it’s about dancing, it’s evidently best to learn from Mother…’
Lilith never taught Cecilia to dance. She usually ranted about this culture she barely knew.
‘She’d probably come back with some weird guidebook and tell strange stories…’
Lilith often read magazines or handbooks for ladies.
These included guides for socialites or books on etiquette for ladies, but genuine books written by real nobles were few and far between. Mostly, they were vain gossips written by a lady’s maid of a noble house, a head maid, or middle-class women as a hobby.
Lilith liked such books. She could read them all day long.
Even though she couldn’t read, she would study the illustrations intensely, immersing herself in her own research.
Then, like a historian studying hieroglyphs, she would seriously instruct Cecilia.
“You need to be careful when you wear flower decorations in your hair. You might get stung by a bee.”
“That’s a caricature… Who wears live flowers outdoors these days?”
“Oh, can’t you trust your mother? I saw it in the latest issue!”
When Cecilia occasionally responded cheekily, Lilith would stubbornly insist she was right. It was easier to just play along.
‘It would be better if she learned to read…’
She had been at the count’s estate for over ten years, so there had been plenty of opportunities to learn.
Lilith absolutely refused to memorize letters.
It wasn’t that she hated studying or was particularly slow. Although not exceptionally bright, she was a woman with a keen survival instinct.
Cecilia once thought Lilith was lazy and lived in ignorance. But now she knew the reason.
Adam discouraged her from learning to read.
A wife who manages the household budget and shares ledgers with him naturally needs to be literate and numerate, but a lover does not need to be.
If Lilith were to scrutinize his business plans or investment details and interfere, he would find it bothersome and presumptuous.
Therefore, Lilith never studied, no matter what.
Remaining ignorant allowed Adam to treat her more comfortably.
It’s not that his relationship with Bernarda was bad, but, well…
‘From Father’s point of view, she’s more like a business partner.’
The way her father looked at Bernarda was devoid of warmth. There was minimal respect, but even that was different from how other noble families treated their wives.
Sometimes she wondered. What kind of relationship did he have with Bernarda? Definitely not love. Friendship… was also a bit of a stretch.
‘Why did they meet in the first place?’
Her father was a money-maker. Even marriage, to him, was a business.
If there was no profit, there would be no marriage.
Cecilia once fretted needlessly over why her father had remarried a daughter from a nearly bankrupt baron’s family.
There were talks that it was because Bernarda had accepted Lilith, but honestly, if there had been overwhelming financial gain besides the dowry, Adam would have left her elsewhere.
‘Maybe, but…’
Bernarda’s family was on the brink of ruin. Bernarda was on the verge of stepping out to work herself, and she remarried Adam just at the brink.
So… that meant just before the former countess passed away.
