I Married the Mad Duke Who Killed My Husband - Chapter 39
I thought I was fine, but it seems deep down, that recent events were bothering me after all.
‘Maybe if I bang my head somewhere, I’ll wake up.’
While listening to the verbal abuse from my parents and brother, I suddenly realized this was a dream. They appeared as they were before I married Cassion, perfectly normal.
‘You monster. How could you abandon your parents? If you had just given us money after your remarriage, we would have withdrawn cleanly.’
“Well, well. So I was thinking like this?”
‘You killed us. You destroyed your brother!’
“This is strange. There’s no way I felt this much guilt.”
Parents who tried to marry me off to a Duke less than a week after sending me to the Marquis wouldn’t have withdrawn just because of money.
I felt disgusted remembering that dreams reflect the unconscious. Deep in my heart, perhaps, maybe, did I have such thoughts? Was I such a weak and foolish person?
“I want to wake up from this dog of a dream.”
‘You devil! You’ll get everything back. You’ll pay for all your sins!’
As I looked around for somewhere to bang my head, my brother Parmenion’s normal appearance suddenly changed into the filthy state I saw a few days ago, and he shoved me hard.
Having turned my back carelessly, I tumbled onto the pure white space in surprise.
“Huh?”
Was violence possible even in dreams? Though there was no pain, the sensation of being pushed and falling was so vivid it was absurd.
“If you’re going to be like that, then I…”
But if violence was possible in dreams, couldn’t I also use violence against them?
Pff, after blowing my bangs away with my breath, I stood up and turned around to find my family gone and Jenin standing there.
Unlike when my family appeared, as I hesitated for a moment, Jenin pointed at me.
‘Hypocrite.’
“…Ah, really. This dream is annoying.”
‘Did you think throwing money at me while pretending to be friendly would make up for stealing my place? You’re a hypocrite.’
“I never thought like that!”
‘His side is my place.’
“I didn’t even really get married, it was just a contract marriage to survive, why do I have to have this nightmare? You’re not even the real Jenin. Disappear!”
I jumped up and shouted, then realized I had gotten caught up in the dream’s flow when Jenin appeared. I took a couple of steps back and caught my breath.
‘Just because you have some inaccurate memories from a past life, you think you’re something special? I’m the protagonist!’
“I’m the protagonist of my own life. Stop being childish.”
‘You’re the protagonist? Hah.’
Jenin laughs with a face I’ve never seen before. That laughter gradually becomes deeper and more chilling as the pure white world slowly turns red.
‘Then the end of your story will be endlessly unhappy!’
“…This was already an unhappy story. What’s wrong with changing a romance novel where the protagonists die?”
‘Me? Cassion? Can you change Cassion’s death?’
“I can! Even now, I’m doing well…”
‘You? You? You? You? You?’
Jenin’s face comes right up to mine. No, it wasn’t even Jenin’s face anymore.
It seemed like my brother’s face, then like Cassion’s face. The faces of everyone flashed by.
Even knowing it was a dream, it was terrifying to see them laughing mockingly while crying tears of blood.
“I’m getting out of this kind of dream! I never thought like this!”
Since I couldn’t see anything around me, I banged my head on the floor. When nothing happened, I banged it several more times.
‘Ahaha!! Ahah, ahahahaha! You? You?’
Since there was no pain, I banged without controlling the force, and blood started flowing from my head. I curled up at the sight of the monster mocking my state.
‘Don’t bully my sister!’
At that moment, an infinitely soft touch reached my fingertips as I curled up into a ball.
“…Lili?”
‘My sister, I said! Get away!’
The rabbit doll that toddled in front of me with its tiny limbs bounced like a spring and body-slammed the monster.
The surroundings that had been nothing but red returned to white.
‘Don’t touch her!’
Ridiculously, Lili, who was slapping the monster, had Cassion’s voice. The world spun as the monster, who had only been cackling, fell from Lili’s punch, and I finally woke up from the dream as I had wanted.
“…What kind of crazy dream was that.”
It must have been quite a nightmare, as I had apparently thrashed around in my sleep, kicking off the blanket and flailing my limbs. Because of that, the bedside table had shaken, and Lili had fallen next to me with her characteristic round eyes.
I turned my head while lying down to look at Lili.
“…Is it because Cassion bought you that you have Cassion’s voice? You say ‘sister’ but have a man’s voice.”
It felt like if I talked to her, she would respond with “Sister!” in that absurdly low voice like in the dream.
“That’s creepy.”
Contrary to my words of disgust, I hugged the rabbit doll tightly to my chest. It was still soft and comforting.
Knock knock-
“Asil. Are you still sleeping?”
I thought I could fall into a deep sleep if I just hugged Lili and went back to bed. As I was turning over with drowsy eyes, I suddenly grabbed my chest in surprise at Cassion’s voice.
“Geez, I thought Lili was talking.”
It was because the dream had felt too real. Only then did I properly come to my senses and look around.
Pia, who comes to help me in the mornings, must have seen me deeply asleep and left, as clothes to change into and water for washing were prepared around the room.
Quickly getting out of bed and pulling back the curtains, I saw the sun was already high in the sky. Since I had never slept this late before, it made sense that Cassion, who always ate breakfast with me, would come looking.
“I’m up! Just a moment!”
I quickly tidied my face, just removing the sleep from my eyes, and headed to the door. My hair was messy and puffy from thrashing in my sleep, but that shouldn’t matter.
Bang-
“Why did you sleep in…”
Cassion, who had been leaning against the doorframe waiting for me to open the door, stopped mid-sentence as he looked at me. Does my appearance look that strange?
“What’s wrong with your face?”
“My face? What about my face?”
“For someone who slept this late, you have dark circles under your eyes.”
He bent down and thrust his face right in front of mine. Whoa, isn’t he being too familiar?
“Just had a bit of a messy dream.”
“Dream? Did you have a nightmare?”
Though I tried to be indirect, Cassion hit the nail on the head. I pouted, not wanting to seem weak by admitting it was a nightmare, making Cassion’s brow furrow.
“It wasn’t quite a nightmare… Besides, Lili appeared halfway through and defeated it. I guess they’re right when they say dolls by the bedside are guardian spirits that ward off bad dreams. You should get one too.”
Fortunately, while Cassion’s face twisted, he didn’t ask about the content of the dream. I led him, who was standing blankly at the door, to sit on the sofa in the room, and washed my face in the basin Pia had brought.
“If you didn’t sleep well, wouldn’t it be better to go back to sleep?”
“Pfft. I’m already done washing up?”
I turned my head while wiping off the water with a fluffy towel. Of all things, Cassion was looking at the blanket that had fallen to the floor.
“Hey, it’s not polite to examine a lady’s bed.”
“What lady lets a man into her bedroom while washing up and brushing her hair?”
“Why? As long as I don’t change clothes, it’s fine.”
“…Just in case, if you’re going to change clothes, I’ll leave, so please don’t start doing it.”
When I giggled, Cassion looked at me with a somewhat relieved expression. Though we were exchanging jokes, I could feel him considering my state after having a nightmare in his own way.
“Aren’t you tired?”
“I’m a bit stiff, but it’s nothing. Why? Do we have something to do?”
“No, just thought that… um… ahem. We should show ourselves dating after a while. We haven’t gone out much since the party. We need to talk about future plans too, and it might be better than being cooped up at home.”
“Dating?”
“Wouldn’t it be better to eat some sweets and spend some money? …Unless you’re tired.”
“No, that’s a good idea! Let’s buy you a doll too. Ah, and we need to buy commoner clothes for our honeymoon.”
Nothing beats wasting money to lift your spirits! When I jumped around excitedly, Cassion got up with a small smile.
“Then I’ll call your maid, so get ready and come down.”
“Okay! I’ll be right out!”
The unsettling dream that seemed like it would affect my mood all day vanished in an instant. I smiled while laying out my outdoor clothes even before Pia arrived.
