I Married the Mad Duke Who Killed My Husband - Chapter 88
The waiting time felt unbearably long.
I hadn’t been concerned about my disheveled appearance in front of Cassion’s soldiers, but even in these times of war, I wanted to look pretty for him. I wiped my face and dusted off the blood and dirt from my clothes.
Still, Cassion hadn’t come, so I examined his tent. Unlike his bedroom that I used to freely enter and leave, this place had a desolate atmosphere.
“…I wonder if he’s been sleeping?”
The hard, small bed was covered with an undisturbed blanket. Surely he hasn’t gone without sleep? Right, someone must have cleaned it.
“Ah.”
On the tray were simple foods like fruit and cheese, but they appeared untouched. As I paced around the tent, chewing my lip, I found just one place that still held his warmth.
“…Cassion.”
My voice trembled with sudden overwhelming emotion. On the small desk where he seemed to write letters to me, there was a spilled inkwell and crumpled papers.
I immediately regretted picking up one of them with trembling hands.
[Asilia, Asil. Please be safe. I’m sorry. I’ll come soon. I shouldn’t have left you…]
“….”
The unsent letters were filled with his repeated pleas. As I tried to steady my breathing, affected by his emotions that seeped deeply through the thin paper, commotion erupted outside the tent.
‘Where… !! Right now…!’
“Cassion!”
It was his voice. He seemed to have reached near the tent.
Unable to contain myself, I lifted the tent flap and burst out, looking around for the source of the voice, and found Cassion who had been running frantically but stopped at the sight of me.
“Cassion!”
Though his armor was spotted with blood here and there, it wasn’t his blood, and it seemed several days old, already turned black. His face looked haggard, but relieved to see no apparent wounds, I quickly ran to him.
“Cassion, it’s me!”
I rushed into his embrace like a charging bull, hugging his completely stiffened form. The hardness of his iron armor struck my body, but I didn’t care. Even with my arms spread as wide as possible, I couldn’t fully embrace his already large frame made even bigger by the armor.
“I missed you. You’re not hurt anywhere, are you?”
“….”
“Cassion? What’s wrong?”
Inside the tent, I’d clearly heard his voice calling for me. But now, face to face, he neither welcomed me nor even greeted me.
His red eyes, wider than I’d ever seen them, looked down at me as if seeing an apparition.
“Ca…?!”
As I tried to call his name again, suddenly moisture began to well up in his red eyes. I thought I was imagining it, but as his eyes grew increasingly wavering, I looked around in confusion.
I wanted to find something to cover his face, but only the man who had guided me stood there, shrugging his shoulders – I wasn’t even sure when he had appeared.
“Come here…!”
Thinking he might regret showing weakness in front of his subordinates, being their commander and all, I pulled the man over to at least partially shield Cassion from view.
As I turned my head away from Cassion to do this, a cold, large hand gently touched my face.
“Asil… Asilia.”
Startled by his ice-cold fingertips, I turned back to face him, and his tears dropped onto my cheek. Drop. Drip. Before I could process it, tears were pouring like rain, and though I was momentarily flustered, my heart overflowed with sympathy and remorse for Cassion.
“…I’m here. It’s alright.”
I know how warm his hands usually are. His body temperature had dropped so much his fingertips looked almost blue, revealing how shocked and tense he must have been.
“Asil…”
“This isn’t a dream or an illusion. It’s really me!”
His trembling hands hovered around my face. I caught them and pressed them against my cheeks, looking up at him, which only made more tears pour from his red eyes.
“….”
I silently sent a look to the watching man asking him to handle things, then took Cassion’s hand and led him into the tent.
Cassion followed me, crying soundlessly like air.
Flutter.
“Cassion.”
After carefully closing the tent entrance, I called to him as he was shedding tears in earnest, and his anguished gaze turned towards me.
“You must have a lot to say… but let’s just be together for a moment.”
“Asilia…”
“Come here. I want to feel you close, so just take that off.”
No sooner had I finished speaking than Cassion hurriedly removed his armor. Then, taking his hand again, I led him to the narrow bed in the tent where we collapsed together.
“….”
“….”
On the bed, embracing each other tightly, only the soft sound of his tears falling could be heard. No, I could also feel the pounding of our hearts pressed together.
“Asilia…”
It seemed Cassion could feel the heartbeats, too. His trembling body gradually stabilized, and his stiff arms wrapped around me tightly, almost constricting. It was a bit suffocating but not unpleasant.
Silently, I stroked the back of his head while gazing at him, our foreheads touching.
“I’m here, Cassion.”
Slowly, very slowly, I approached him.
His lips, which I carefully touched, were so dry and chapped that I worried they might hurt, but they weren’t as cold as his fingertips.
After confirming his warmth with a childlike, lips-barely-touching kiss and feeling each other’s breath, the tears in his wide-open eyes gradually ceased.
Finding it a bit cute and amusing that Cassion stopped crying at this intimate moment, I rubbed my nose against his.
“It’s me.”
Our lips met again, and this time, he responded.
***
“Oh my, look at your swollen eyes. How are you going to face your subordinates like this?”
“I’m not going anywhere without you.”
“This is a battlefront right now, you know? Is that something a commander should say?”
“I don’t care.”
We finally sat up after a long while. Cassion wanted to stay close to me, but I handed him some hastily made tea from the boiled water I had asked the soldiers to bring earlier, just peeking my face out of the tent.
With his eyes all puffy, he pouted as he drank the warm tea I gave him.
“Goodness, you’re too big to be acting like a child.”
“Well, I’m no different from a child, so don’t leave me alone. Stay by my side always, Asilia.”
“Do you have any conscience?”
“No such thing.”
We bickered in the now lighter atmosphere. It seemed night had fallen outside.
The First Prince wasn’t in a strong enough position to launch a night attack, so it would be better to consider today’s battle over.
Now that Cassion had confirmed my safety, we would need to discuss the situation going forward, but like him, I chose to feign ignorance and enjoy this peaceful moment a little longer.
“…Last night, I received a telegram saying the Duke’s residence had been attacked and you had gone missing.”
Cassion, having quickly emptied the tea I gave him though it wasn’t that hot, finally began to speak. His voice trembled again, seemingly not wanting to imagine that time, so I quickly made him put down the cup and held his hands.
His hands, now warm again, gripped mine tightly.
“I wanted to go to you immediately, but I trusted the knights at the Duke’s residence, and I knew you were strong… I held back, thinking you might be disappointed if I deserted the frontline for your safe return. But I shouldn’t have.”
“What are you saying? You did well. Just as you said, if you had abandoned this place and returned, I would have scolded you, you know?”
“Whether you scold me or hit me, what would I be afraid of as long as you’re safe? After spending a sleepless night out of my mind, in the morning, a bird came from the First Prince’s camp… with a note saying they had taken you hostage and demanding our surrender.”
“What?!”
Whether it’s our side or the enemy camp, why is everyone making up lies about my whereabouts?
Cassion almost received simultaneously the message from the Second Prince’s side claiming they were protecting me and the threat from the First Prince’s side saying they had taken me hostage. It’s maddening just to imagine.
If I had really gone to the Second Prince’s side or the Imperial Palace, he might not have believed it.
“I couldn’t do anything, Asilia. I just stood there stupidly, yelling at the knights to find out your real location. It felt like I was going mad in a matter of hours.”
“Cassion…”
“…I couldn’t do anything…”
As his eyes welled up with moisture again, he slowly closed them and brought my hand to his lips, kissing my palm. I gently wiped away the tears that overflowed despite his closed eyelids and ran down his cheeks.
“No, that’s not true. You believed in me and held on.”
At my words, Cassion opened his eyes and I kissed his lips once more. For the first time, he smiled slightly.
“You know this is our first kiss? This is an answer, right?”
“If you laugh after crying, you’ll grow horns on your bottom.”
Cassion chuckled with tear stains still on his face and leaned in again. I closed my eyes.
