I Pray That You Forget Me - Chapter 68
‧₊˚ ☁️⋅♡𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.
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“Johann!”
“Rize?”
As soon as our house door opened, I threw myself into Johann’s arms who thankfully hadn’t left for work.
“…”
“What happened?”
I had planned to pretend that my disheveled state was from running, but as soon as I saw Johann’s calm face, the tears I had been holding back burst forth.
“Johann, I—I was so scared…”
My words turned into sobs and then hiccups.
“Rize, tell me. What did he do to you?”
In the midst of my explanation, Johann had already concluded that the Major must have done something terrible to me.
Thud.
He pulled out the revolver from my pocket, checked to ensure it was unloaded, then put it back. His face transformed from one of an angel to that of a harbinger of death. It looked like he was ready to kill the Major right then.
“It—it’s not that…”
Instead of words, I used all my strength to hold Johann back, suddenly unsure of what to say.
‘What should I tell him?’
Just the fact that the Major had s-x with Brigitta in front of me would make Johann think I had been assaulted. And telling him the story would surely reveal that I had been cleaning the Major’s bedroom.
“I saw someone die.”
“….Someone died?”
As I scrambled for an excuse, I worried about what I would say next if he asked how I came to witness someone’s death.
“A soldier was killed by a landmine in the forest.”
The lie came to me in a flash, and suddenly, the scene flashed before my eyes too.
The green forest and bright sunlight, the subtle smell of the woods. A deafening explosion tore through the air, followed by the acrid smell of gunpowder, and the horrific sight of the end I had just witnessed.
It was a scene I had never actually seen, but it was vivid as if I had experienced it firsthand.
“…He just died… He was laughing just moments ago… It was so horrible…”
I had managed to forget those disgraceful scenes of men and women clinging to each other like dogs, and it was the bizarre and cruel image that had made me burst into tears.
“My poor love.”
Johann could only be surprised and comforted me tenderly.
“I wanted to keep you in the safest place in the world…”
“…,”.
“…to shield you from the world’s cruelty…”
“…,”
“…and yet, wondering if pushing you into the cruelest places and causing you pain was really love…”
Johann began to blame himself. How could all these brutal events be his fault?
“I’m okay.”
I assured him, lifting my head from his chest and forcing a smile. Pretending to have regained my composure, Johann took both of my hands in his.
“Let’s pray for that unfortunate soldier. It will ease our minds.”
Following Johann, I prayed for the repose of the soul while feeling confused. Whose rest was I praying for? Did that person even exist? I couldn’t tell if the vivid scene that kept coming back to me was a memory or a delusion.
After our troubled prayer, Johann warned me.
“Never go into the forest.”
The command had planted mines around the bunker in the forest. This was kept secret even from the villagers to prevent the enemy from finding out. This led to occasional casualties among the villagers who went into the forest for wood or hunting due to the shortage of supplies.
“And always wait for the truck when you come back. Don’t come back alone dangerously like today.”
“But waiting is hard…”
“Is there someone bothering you while you wait?”
“No, it’s not that… I just miss you…”
Johann, whose face looked simultaneously heartbroken and overwhelmed, hugged me tightly and sighed deeply.
“I wish I could shrink you down to the size of a thumb and carry you in my pocket.”
He was already reluctant to leave me alone, and now that I was emotionally hurt, it became even harder for him to let me go.
Today, he decided to stay home.
“You’re going to call in absent from school? What are you talking about?”
To soothe Johann, who had decided not to go to work to comfort me, I used the excuse of needing to accompany him to school and left the house.
I ended up getting caught by the principal and spent the morning in his office, chatting over tea before having lunch with Johann.
By then, it seemed as if I had forgotten the day’s events, and Johann didn’t try to hold me back when I said I was leaving.
“You look tired. Go home and get some good sleep. Don’t skimp on the firewood.”
“I will.”
However, instead of going home, I went to the church to spend some time. Eventually, boredom led me to doze off.
To fight off sleepiness, I decided to visit Mrs. Bauer’s farm.
It was just when the puppies born last year had started to run around. The cute puppies helped me forget the day’s events until I saw the mother dog mating with a stray, which jarringly reminded me of the two beasts I had seen earlier.
Realizing that I had forgotten about it only because of the puppies meant that I had not forgotten it all day until then.
“Three minutes. If you don’t come back within that time, a naked man who’s mounting a b***h will come get you wherever you are!”
In reality, the Major’s threat had weighed on my mind, and I had spent all day wandering outside the house.
‘What if he shows up at our house in that condition?’
