I Pray That You Forget Me - Chapter 7
‧₊˚ ☁️⋅♡𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.
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“No, you can’t. How would you have a child like that?”
The ladies, treating it like a serious matter, rolled up their sleeves and began advising me.
“Check tonight to see if it stands.”
“Oh, how do I do that?”
“Oh, how to deal with innocent Rize.”
The ladies sighed and laughed. The landlady, nodding wisely, sat down under the mother cow, holding a bucket in her hands. Then, she grabbed one of the cow’s teats. Was she giving up on me already because I seemed hopeless?
“I’ll teach you, so pay close attention.”
She said she would teach me how to make a man stand, but why was she showing me how to milk a cow instead?
“Hold it like this with your hand, and squeeze it firmly!”
Only then did I realize that the elongated teat resembled a man’s private part, and I was so shocked that I almost let out a small scream.
“Don’t squeeze too hard or pull too forcefully, just gently caress it.”
Could milking a cow’s teat look so indecent?
“As you do that, it will swell and harden.”
So, I’m supposed to caress Johann’s… thing, in that manner?
“When you touch a man, it stands.”
“That’s right, that’s right.”
“But if it doesn’t stand, do what the calf does to its mother’s teat.”
“What?”
“Bite and suck on your husband’s there.”
I was so shocked that I couldn’t close my mouth, and the milk shot into my open mouth. Startled, I saw the landlady tilting the cow’s teat towards me, giggling merrily.
I finally understood.
“Are you teasing me right now?”
“No, it’s real.”
“Well, we really can’t show it…”
“Men go crazy and collapse when you suck them.”
Now even Brigitta was chiming in. Judging by the pitiful look she gave me, it seemed like it was indeed true.
“Ah!”
Once again, a stream of milk shot into my mouth that was open like a fool.
“Don’t suck too hard; men shoot milk too, so suck just enough.”
The ladies giggled again. Even though I didn’t know much, I understood the meaning behind their words.
The milk I unknowingly swallowed felt strangely off. I clenched my mouth.
“I can’t do this.”
“Don’t worry. You won’t need to go that far.”
“Yeah, just suck him once, and he’ll be so thrilled, he’ll jump on you like a stallion. After that, you can leave it to Johann.”
“If he tolerates it, just show him that Rize can handle adult stuff.”
“How do I do that?”
“Take off your clothes.”
“….”
The faces of the women who had been staring at me intently started to distort oddly.
“Surely, Rize…”
“You’ve never shown your naked body to your husband?”
“….Well, no.”
I rarely showed my naked body unless I was bathing. It seemed that it wasn’t so obvious to others, though.
“Do you not even sleep in your underwear?”
I nodded, and then, to their even greater surprise, I made an unexpected comment.
“I wear a cardigan over my pajamas when it’s cold…”
“In that case, forget it!”
“You must be kidding, Rize…”
“You don’t even sleep naked with your husband?”
“Uh… no.”
“If you wrap yourself tightly in the bed like that, anyone would think you don’t want it.”
“Is that true?”
So, was I unconsciously rejecting Johann while misunderstanding that he was rejecting me?
Oh my goodness. I really am foolish.
***
“I can’t do it. But… no, I can’t do it.”
Wandering around the attic, someone knocked on the attic door.
“Rize.”
It was Johann. The only man who would knock when returning to the house would be Johann.
“I’m back.”
“Come on in.”
Opening the attic door and ascending the ladder, he looked burdened with something in both hands. Seeing the largest bundle, I asked.
“What’s this?”
“It’s a comforter.”
“Oh…”
“I was lucky. It just came in at the general store today, Mr. Kohler said so.”
“Even though I told you not to buy.”
We needed to save money. With the house reduced to ashes by the bombing and savings depleted for my hospital bills, we had no money.
“I don’t mind spending this money if it means you can sleep warmly.”
“Johann…”
How could I not love such a man?
“And don’t worry. When we leave here, we can sell the comforter again.”
Still, we wouldn’t be able to sell it for as much as we bought it.
I wasted our money by lying yesterday.
I felt sorry, but I couldn’t confess that I didn’t say such words because I was worried about the man who smiled contentedly while laying the comforter on my sleeping spot.
While I hesitated and wavered, Johann unfolded another bundle on the table.
“It’s a gift.”
“Wow, hyacinths. They look beautiful.”
Today, even with a lot of stuff, he inevitably brought flowers to decorate the table. I held the colorful hyacinths and buried my nose in the fully bloomed petals.
“It feels like a picnic in a flower field.”
“I thought you would like it.”
Does he think of me every time he looks at flowers?
“Thank you, Johann.”
While gazing at Johann’s lips, tinged with a subtle smile, I gathered courage.
‘I can do this much.’
If Johann doesn’t do it, I can do it first. I raised my heels and leaned towards him, extending my lips.
