I Want To Die One Day Before You - Chapter 154
Rufus’s face hardened.
“I said no.”
“Then why won’t you take it off?”
Sarubia, amused by teasing Rufus, stuck out her tongue and approached him. Drops of water fell from the ends of her still-damp, ivory-colored hair. The transparent droplets traced the curves of her skin.
“…”
Instead of answering, Rufus chose to avoid the topic.
He couldn’t take it off.
He couldn’t show it.
He absolutely, absolutely couldn’t show it.
He didn’t want Sarubia to see the scar Prince Tarek had left on his chest.
“Huh? Why are you avoiding my gaze?”
Sarubia, now right in front of him, smiled slyly and poked his cheek.
“What’s wrong? Are you embarrassed?”
“…”
Rufus remained silent.
Misinterpreting his silence, Sarubia rested her chin on her hand and burst out laughing.
“Hmm, I didn’t want to go this far… but if you take off your clothes, I’ll take off mine too! How about that? Interested?”
Sarubia watched Rufus with an expectant expression.
But the response she got was,
“I refuse.”
A sharp rejection.
Sarubia was taken aback by Rufus’s unexpected reaction.
“R-Rufus… are you sick?”
“What?”
“I said I’d take off my clothes first… but you refused me…”
Sarubia squatted on the rock and buried her face in her hands. The sound of sniffles seeped through her fingers.
Rufus was startled by Sarubia’s sudden crying.
“Sarubia?”
He called her name urgently, but unlike usual, there was no response. Only the sound of her sobbing filled the air.
Did I make a mistake? Did I hurt her?
Frightened by the thought that he might have hurt Sarubia, Rufus hurried to her side and sat down.
“S-Sarubia, I’m sorry. It’s just, I…”
As he began to spill out a jumble of apologies,
Flap!
Rufus’s coat flew into the air. At the same time, Sarubia grabbed his arm tightly.
“Gotcha!”
“S-Sarubia.”
Rufus froze. He could feel Sarubia’s warmth through his wet shirt.
“Come on, stop acting like a child and take off your clothes. If you catch a cold before tomorrow’s banquet, it’ll be a disaster.”
“Wait, hold on…”
He wanted to escape. He wanted to shake off her hand and step back. But he was afraid that if he moved wrong, Sarubia might fall off the rock.
What should I do?
While Rufus was struggling internally, Sarubia seemed very pleased with herself, in many ways.
“Wow, I never thought I’d get to undress you first. Somehow, this is exciting.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“Shh, it’s okay. I won’t do anything weird. You trust me, right, Rufus?”
Haa…
Finally half-giving up, Rufus watched as Sarubia placed her hands on his shirt. Like a mischievous child playing a prank, Sarubia began to hum a tune as she unbuttoned his shirt one by one.
“…”
Rufus bit his lip tightly.
He wasn’t embarrassed to be shirtless in front of Sarubia. That wasn’t the problem. The real issue was the scar on his chest.
He didn’t want to show it to Sarubia…
But then again, he knew that eventually, Sarubia would find out about the scar. Dr. Fertina, who treated him, had said that the scar on Rufus’s chest couldn’t be easily removed with healing magic.
Until now, he had managed to hide it by keeping his clothes tightly wrapped around him, but he couldn’t keep it a secret forever.
He knew this. He knew Sarubia would find out about the scar one day. But, even so, he didn’t want to show it to her now…
He only wanted to show her the good things…
As he was lost in these chaotic thoughts, a cool sensation settled on his chest. The scar was revealed as the buttons were undone.
At that moment.
“Oh.”
A short syllable escaped from Sarubia’s lips.
“…”
Rufus clamped his mouth shut. He could feel her eyes tracing the scar. He couldn’t bring himself to meet her gaze, so he turned his head away.
“R-Rufus…”
Sarubia’s cracked voice reached him from the edge of his vision.
“This… why, how… did you get hurt fighting demons or something… Oh, this… oh…”
She couldn’t seem to find the right words.
“…”
Rufus also found it hard to speak.
The scar running across his chest was hideous. It was difficult for even him to look at it. He could only imagine how Sarubia must feel right now.
Was she shocked? Horrified? Or scared? Or maybe, was she so repulsed by the sight that her affection for him vanished?
Yes.
The scar was hideous, even to his own eyes. The new skin that had grown over the magically seared scar was grotesque. It was understandable if Sarubia found it repulsive.
A terrible sense of guilt washed over him.
This was wrong.
I wanted to show you only the good things in this world.
I wanted to show you only the purest, most perfect, and precious things.
I didn’t want to show you such a disgraceful mark.
“Sarubia, I’m sorry…”
“No, I’m sorry.”
Rufus’s voice was muffled as he buried his face in Sarubia’s embrace.
Thud.
Rufus collapsed into her arms.
“…Sarubia?”
Sarubia wrapped her arms around his thin back. She held him as tightly as she could.
It was almost a desperate gesture.
