I Want To Die One Day Before You - Chapter 95
After much contemplation, Rufus decided to try again.
“Today……”
“Hm? What about today?”
Following Rufus’s voice, Sarubia turned her head towards him.
As their eyes met, Rufus found himself speechless again. In that brief moment, all the eloquent phrases that had been organized in his mind evaporated like steam.
Ah. Here we go again.
“……You’re not wearing a nightgown.”
After searching for something to say for a long time, Rufus ended up with this sentence.
I meant to say… you look beautiful today as well.
It was already late, but Sarubia wasn’t wearing a nightgown, instead, she was dressed in her maid’s attire.
Sarubia nodded briskly.
“I wanted to look nice since you were coming, Lord Rufus.”
“Look nice……”
Right. That’s exactly what I wanted to say.
Rufus smiled slightly and scanned Sarubia’s attire from top to bottom. Misinterpreting Rufus’s reaction, Sarubia’s face flushed red.
“Ah, I know. This is what I wear for work, but it’s the prettiest thing I have.”
“……”
The prettiest was her work clothes.
This wasn’t right.
You deserve better. At an age when you should want to dress up, how can you be confined to wearing these dull black and white clothes in this musty attic every day?
“Look, I even added a brooch here!”
Sarubia pointed to her chest, showing it to Rufus. There, a pebble no bigger than a fingernail hung precariously.
“……”
That’s quite different from any brooch he knew.
Rufus carefully observed the pebble brooch Sarubia had pinned above her heart.
Was this truly a brooch? Even the eccentric Baroness Inferna wouldn’t wear such a thing.
It was too crude to be called jewelry. It looked like a piece of rock picked up from the street. What exactly was it made of?
“……May I touch it?”
“Yes. But the glue doesn’t hold well, so it might fall off if you touch it carelessly… Ah, it fell off again.”
With a soft sound, the small rock fell to the ground.
Rufus picked up the fallen piece from the floor. Its rough surface felt just like a randomly picked rock.
“Where on earth did you get this?”
“Oh, I made it.”
“You did?”
“Yes.”
Sarubia twiddled the hem of her skirt with her fingers, seeming embarrassed.
“I found it pretty when I went fishing and picked it up… It’s a bit lame, right? Haha, maybe I should just throw it away.”
Rufus stopped Sarubia as she tried to take the rock piece from his hand.
“If you’re going to throw it away, give it to me.”
“Huh?”
“I gave you cookies, so as a return gift, give me this brooch you made.”
Sarubia blinked in surprise at Rufus’s words.
“But exchanging a rock for cookies doesn’t really make sense, does it?”
“I’m the one who benefits more.”
Rufus tucked the rock piece into his pocket and embraced Sarubia.
“I’ll keep it, thinking you made it for me.”
“Lord Rufus, you like rocks?”
“It’s not the rock I like, it’s you.”
Rufus kissed Sarubia’s forehead. Sarubia, smiling, pulled at Rufus’s sleeve.
“Only on the forehead?”
“Should I do it elsewhere too?”
“Yes.”
Sarubia grinned and closed her eyes.
“Please kiss me.”
Then, Rufus’s lips descended onto Sarubia’s.
It was warm.
Merely touching her, yet his heart was already swirling with emotion, racing at the contact.
Rufus’s hand covered Sarubia’s, rough and calloused from scars. Sarubia didn’t mind the man’s coarse hand enclosing hers.
“I missed you.”
As Rufus stroked Sarubia’s back, he spoke in a low voice.
“Me too. I missed you a lot.”
Sarubia, clinging to Rufus, whispered back.
“Since that day, I kept looking up at the sky, wondering if you would reappear. I missed you so much.”
So much. That single phrase burrowed deep into Rufus’s heart.
“I even talked to every crow I saw, thinking maybe you’d come back as a crow to find me.”
Sarubia giggled and kissed Rufus’s lips.
“I didn’t expect you to come as a butterfly. But I like the butterfly more.”
“Why?”
“Because there are more butterflies than crows, so every time I see a butterfly, I can think of you…”
Sarubia’s tender voice echoed in his ears.
He couldn’t bear it.
Everything about her was too warm, too gentle. Wrapped in the blissful defeat of knowing he could no longer live without her, he could only blindly desire her.
In the Inferna domain, there were hardly any peers of Rufus’s age. And he had little interest in the women who were close in age. He knew little of the complex affairs of love between men and women, the conflicts of push and pull.
It was simple.
He was happy when she was there. He missed her when she was not.
That was all.
An affection akin to obsession, formed purely on instinct, not sophisticated or refined.
The witch Odr was right. Love was a curse. It drove Rufus mad.
And he didn’t mind it at all.
“Where will you go now, Lord Rufus? Will you return to your hometown?”
“No, I’m going to the border.”
“The border? Why?”
“His Majesty the King has given me an order.”
Hearing Rufus’s words, Sarubia’s face darkened.
“But the war is over, isn’t it? With the Demon King dead, why go back to the border?”
“You know, Prince Tarek is currently missing. His Majesty ordered me to find the prince.”
“Ah…”
