Overpowered Reincarnation Perks! - Chapter 11.4

I had anticipated rejection, or him saying it was out of the blue, or pushing me away saying we weren’t that close yet.

But Arvan was much quicker to catch on than I thought, understood me well, and…

“You needed comfort, didn’t you?”

He was worried about me.

“But Ju-in. Impulsively doing things to forget your troubles isn’t a solution at all.”

Speaking like a doctor, Arvan wrapped both his hands around mine.

“You might forget the pain for a moment, but that time passes quickly. Let’s find another solution.”

“Isn’t that too many words when you could just say you don’t want to sleep with me?”

“I’m saying this because I don’t dislike it.”

I was momentarily stunned by his unexpected answer.

“You don’t dislike it? Really?”

“How could I dislike it? Still, I can’t grant your request.”

“Why?”

“Because you don’t like me.”

This too was an unexpected answer.

“You can get physical pleasure even without affection. But that’s not what you need or are asking from me. I don’t want to hurt you.”

“…There was a man who liked me, and I hurt him.”

The words spilled out on their own. My mouth moved before I could even be surprised.

“He said he doesn’t want to see me. That facing me is too painful, that he wants to forget. I know it’s because I made a huge mistake, but strangely, it hurts.”

Words gushed out of my open mouth. My nose stung, and I consciously took a breath, raising my shoulders.

“More than feeling sorry for him, I feel more disappointed that I can’t turn things back. The desire to be comforted outweighs the desire to be forgiven.”

“That can happen.”

“Don’t you think I’m too shameless? Do I look selfish in your eyes too, Arvan?”

“Everyone wants to protect themselves. Especially when faced with unbearable pain.”

Arvan raised his hand and removed my glasses. Although the magic stone glasses are meaningless to Arvan now that he’s seen me put them on and take them off, I felt a little tense as one layer of protection covering my eyes disappeared.

“Stay still for a moment.”

Arvan’s fingertips lightly touched and left my eyes. As I blinked, he gently rubbed around my eyes.

It was like a gesture to relieve fatigue, but strangely, I felt my mind clearing.

“Arvan.”

“I guess it’s not bad enough to cry.”

He smiled softly.

“I guess I was the selfish one.”

“What do you mean?”

“You probably needed someone, anyone, to comfort you, but I pushed you away with a lecture.”

Arvan moved his face slightly closer. I could see his mesmerizing purple eyes.

I had looked into his eyes this closely yesterday too, but it didn’t feel like this then.

“Can I comfort you now?”

I didn’t answer. Despite the awkward silence, Arvan didn’t rush me and waited. Feeling embarrassed to keep staring into his eyes, I turned my gaze away.

That’s when our lips met.

‘Ah.’

Arvan didn’t part his lips. Without licking or biting, he just touched them lightly and pulled away.

A slightly spicy herb scent mixed with his soft body fragrance.

I think I understood why his kiss wasn’t deeper.

“I didn’t want to be just ‘anyone’ for you.”

“……”

“So this is all the comfort I can offer you.”

The indoor air that I thought was warm now felt a bit hot, and following the instinct to find coolness, my gaze turned to his purple eyes. I hadn’t noticed because he was always smiling gently, but Arvan’s eyes were surprisingly cool.

Not cold enough to freeze, but cool enough to draw out body heat if immersed for too long.

“Do it one more time.”

At my words, spoken as if entranced, Arvan’s eyes narrowed.

He carefully cupped my face and pressed his lips to my eyes. His lips touched my nose bridge and brushed against my cheek. It felt like being tickled by a soft feather, making my heart flutter.

My lips parted naturally towards him, but Arvan didn’t kiss me. His long fingers closed my mouth and gently rubbed it.

‘This isn’t enough.’

When I looked at him with complaining eyes, his lips briefly touched where his fingers had been. But before I could open my mouth, he pulled away.

A kiss that really just barely touched and left.

Where the faint scent and warmth had brushed past, anxiety and regret remained. I didn’t know how to fill this void.

“Arvan.”

“I said once. Any more and it’ll be difficult for me too.”

He smiled as if troubled.

I suppose he means this is the most kindness he can offer without getting hurt himself, since what I want is comfort.

“I’ll brew you some tea. If you drink it and sleep, your mind will be at ease.”

“Will it really?”

“Most problems are solved after a good night’s sleep.”

I nodded, agreeing to some extent. Arvan put his arm around my shoulder and led me to the kitchen.

He sat me down at the table and brewed the tea.

It smelled different from the usual black tea. It wasn’t the warm milk he usually gave before bed either.

“What kind of tea is this?”

“Tea that will make Ju-in comfortable.”

“You mean it’ll make me comfortable forever?”

“What? Haha!”

Arvan laughed loudly.

“I wouldn’t give you anything dangerous.”

“Who knows? You might have lost interest in me since you stopped halfway through the kiss.”

“Ju-in should have more confidence.”

I said it half-jokingly because it was suspicious that he wouldn’t specify the type of tea, but Arvan brewed two cups, including his own.

He must have known it was a joke, but I appreciated his consideration in trying to reassure me.

“Which one is my cup?”

“Choose whichever you like. They’re the same anyway.”

That’s true. I saw him brew the tea and take out identical cups.

When I chose a cup, Arvan took the remaining one. Then he emptied his cup before me. Seeing him drink it in one shot, it must not be hot. I blew on my tea a bit and started sipping it.

The tea was fragrant and sweet.

‘I’ve never had tea like this before, I wonder what kind of leaves it is.’

As the aromatic tea went down my throat, a warm sensation filled my body and I felt drowsy all over.

‘Why are my eyelids so heavy?’

It felt like all my senses were being pulled down to the floor. I felt like I could fall asleep at any moment.

“Ar, van……”

“You can sleep peacefully, Ju-in.”

Strange. Arvan drank the same tea, but why is he fine? I feel like my body is sticking to the floor.

─ This? It’s a stimulant.

─ It’s too strong for you to eat. My master said to avoid it if possible.

No way.

“Arvan, that, plan.”

“That’s right. We decided to go through with it tonight because it seemed there was no chance of success otherwise.”

But it’s too dangerous, so not you, Ju-in.

Saying that, Arvan picked me up. My limp body swayed in his arms with each step.

“When you wake up, it’ll all be over. So rest easy, Ju-in.”

Arvan laid my relaxed body on the bed and covered me with a blanket.

No. Why are you leaving me behind when we agreed to go together? I asked you to help. Are you abandoning me because you think I won’t be helpful?

Questions, pleas, resentment – none of the words swirling in my mouth came out.

I sank into deep sleep as if submerged in water.

***

I was in darkness.

Since I’m not dead, is this a dream? Is it just darkness because it’s the unconscious world?

“What should I do? I need to wake up quickly.”

My mind was anxious, but my body, already deeply asleep, showed no signs of waking. What if I really sleep until tomorrow morning like this?

“Even though we planned the operation together……”

I did think it was a bit odd when I heard we should postpone it until tomorrow, even though tonight would be best to carry it out.

I thought there might be circumstances I didn’t know about, and since Arvan is cautious, he might have made a different judgment than me.

I never imagined they were planning to infiltrate the central palace without me.

“Saying it’s dangerous so I should stay out, where’s the logic in that?”

They said we were comrades. Was I not a comrade?

“Why am I always the exception?”

Or is this my karma too?

Is this throwing me into this situation to understand the position of those left behind, as punishment for sacrificing myself and leaving Callion and Senes?

“My situation was different. I was destined to die because of the system anyway……”

Even though there was no one to hear, excuses poured out in a surge of emotion.

“Hey, isn’t there any way?”

I asked the empty space.

The system window appeared even after death, so maybe it would respond in my unconscious too.

“Why are you quiet now? You never rested when overworking me!”

Ding.

As if responding to my complaint, the system window appeared.

But that window was empty.

Please state your desired quest.

“……”

The quest I want? If I say it, can I wake up from this sleep?

‘But a quest? What should I choose?’

Usually, it forced me without options, but now it gives me freedom at a time like this?

“A quest that would wake me up……”

Nothing specific comes to mind.

But among what I know, there’s one quest that’s the most arbitrary, forceful and gives the tightest time limit.

“Lazy hero…?”

Ding.

I heard the sound of letters being typed on the cyan hologram, and an enlarged window appeared before me.

[Lazy hero, let’s get it together!]

You’ve been asleep for too long, leaving your party members behind.

Wake up and rejoin the party.

You will be forcibly awakened in 15 seconds.

……It worked.