Please Kill Me - Chapter 130
From the beginning, no matter what he did to Yekaterina, he could never change her mind. The overwhelming sense of betrayal and emptiness sliced through him like a knife.
“If you were planning to leave like this, you shouldn’t have left me behind. Yekaterina.”
Leonid’s anguished voice rasped painfully. Yekaterina shouldn’t have let him act like a fool, shouldn’t have made him reveal all his vulnerable parts. She shouldn’t have comforted him or thrown herself off the cliff to save him.
She shouldn’t have said things that made him think he had strangled her heart. With betrayal came a sense of resentment.
If she hadn’t crossed that line, he wouldn’t have had to know her. He wouldn’t have felt that they were both survivors.
She shouldn’t have done that.
“I shouldn’t have wanted your life or you.”
In the end, his worst fears came true. While he had invested everything and been hurt alone, the other person had no such thoughts.
The reality of waking up was as bitter as the dream had been sweet.
Even now, Yekaterina’s unchanging expression, as if she was always there to strangle his heart, fueled his anger. Leonid stood before her, stared intently at her averted face, and finally spoke.
“…Just one question. Was there anything meaningful in the time we spent together?”
Yekaterina’s lips moved. After a brief hesitation, she replied.
“No.”
“Not even yesterday? You fell off the cliff for me.”
“You want to live, and I want to die. I thought it wouldn’t matter if things went wrong.”
At her words, Leonid’s brow furrowed deeply.
“Then what about the kiss we shared?”
“You said it yourself. I was enchanted by you.”
“Yes, you did say that. But you also said you liked it. I thought maybe it was just the way Offenbach was, but that too had no meaning.”
He had been so anxious and clueless. Leonid’s hand, with a mocking smile, gently lifted Yekaterina’s chin.
“Look at me, Yekaterina Offenbach.”
Yekaterina lifted her eyes, and their gazes met in the air.
“Do you really think I mean nothing to you?”
“…Yes.”
“Is that so?”
Leonid’s smile twisted sharply, as if in pain.
“That’s unfortunate. It’s not the same for me.”
“…Leonid?”
“If you crossed my line so freely, you shouldn’t expect to easily escape.”
Leonid’s arm wrapped around Yekaterina’s waist, pulling her tightly against him. His thumb pressed gently against her lower lip as he held her chin up.
Leonid’s gaze slowly moved between her red lips and dark eyes.
Yekaterina, who understood what it meant now, hadn’t realized it until yesterday.
“If you don’t like it, push me away. I’m not planning to stop this time.”
Leonid’s whisper melded with Yekaterina’s lips. She closed her eyes involuntarily at the kiss that seemed to insist on his desire for her. She had no intention of pushing him away from the start.
A vague thought crossed her mind.
‘I should have died back then.’
When she first met Leonid, he should never have let her live. It should have ended then. It shouldn’t have come to this. She made him dangerous, and he made her want to live.
If he had killed her back then, everything would have been neatly resolved. But now, they have come this far.
Yekaterina realized for the first time that it was possible to feel sadness even without emptiness.
* * *
Their parted lips met again in a fresh, sticky motion. The brushing movement against her wet skin was rough and violent. As if the patience he claimed to have shown yesterday was not a lie.
The man indulged her without giving her a chance to breathe. He traced the inside of her soft lips, savoring her increasingly rapid breaths. Her jaw was held open tightly, and the intrusion left her no room for other thoughts while pressing her relentlessly.
It wasn’t until her chest rose and fell desperately that he withdrew, pretending to be gentle and enjoying the way Yekaterina clung to him.
After repeating this several times, Yekaterina’s face was flushed red. Her lips, sticky and dry from lack of air, panted with heated breaths, and her glazed eyes were defenselessly focused on him.
Does she even realize how seductive she looks right now?
If someone else were to see Yekaterina in this state, Leonid would swear he’d gouge out their eyes. For it was Yekaterina who could instantly strip away his composure and indifference.
In her presence, Leonid always felt like an immature fool. He became an emotionally unstable adolescent, as if his actions could be mistaken for those of a fifteen-year-old in the throes of puberty.
He lost his calm and his reason, leaving only his life, mortgaged to her.
