The Abandoned and Terminally Ill Lady Married a Monster - Chapter 18
Chapter 18
He winced, as if he felt the pain himself. His eyebrows furrowed, mirroring my own discomfort. He took a deep breath, trying to control his anger. In a low voice, he asked, “Was this your fault too?”
“…Yes. It was my fault…”
“And you living here alone, is that your fault too?”
My cheeks burned. He didn’t need to ask that. Humiliated, I pulled my hand away from his, hiding it behind my back and avoiding his gaze.
“It’s because I’m a bad child. I deserve to be punished. You get punished when you do something wrong, too.”
“Now that I look closely, your cheek is slightly swollen. Was that from being punished for something you did wrong, too?”
I’d tried to hide it with my hair, but the swelling hadn’t gone down completely, and Kin had noticed. I couldn’t bear the thought of him seeing all my flaws. I started to resent him.
‘Couldn’t he just pretend not to notice? It’s all my fault I’m like this. Why does he have to point it out?’ ‘Mother and Father did nothing… nothing wrong.’ ‘They said it’s a blessing they even raise someone like me, someone so inadequate.’ ‘How could I survive on my own out there?’
The tears I’d swallowed yesterday threatened to resurface.
“Come with me, Ailee. Let’s go to my house.”
“You’re a commoner. How could you possibly provide for me? You said you have a sick family member, too.” Kin opened his mouth, then closed it again. ‘See? How could you possibly take me with you?’
“We can live together. I’ll make sure you have a better life than this. It’s obvious you were punished for something that wasn’t your fault, like yesterday. Why would you stay here?”
“Why… why are you saying things like that…?”
‘Something that wasn’t my fault.’ His words echoed in my ears. Had anyone ever spoken up for me like that? Had anyone ever taken my side? But I couldn’t accept his words so easily. ‘It’s better if I’m just incompetent and foolish. That’s less painful. Then maybe someday Mother and Father will accept me. It’s better than being punished just for being me…’
Tears welled up and spilled over. I hated Kin for pointing out this truth. I shouldn’t hate him, but I did. The only person who’d taken my side was now chipping away at my fragile world.
“Mother and Father did nothing wrong, they… they didn’t, sob… It’s because I’m a bad child, that’s why, waah… How many times do I have to tell you!”
‘Go away, just go away.’ ‘Don’t show me the truth I don’t want to face. Don’t give me false hope. Don’t make me think I could live a normal life like you.’ ‘If that weren’t the case, I’d still be treated like a fool both at home and in society. How can I bear being treated like a fool when I’ve done nothing wrong?’ ‘Just let me be a fool.’ Tears streamed down my face.
“Go away! Just go away!” I pounded on Kin’s shoulders, but even making a fist was painful. Whether he was startled or I’d lost my balance and pushed him, Kin stumbled backward and landed on the floor. I fell forward, landing on top of him. He could have been angry, but he simply looked at me without a trace of annoyance. Then, he wrapped his arms around me. I couldn’t pull away. Instead, I clung to him, burying my face in his clothes.
***
‘This isn’t right.’
He hadn’t meant to make Ailee cry. Why would he ever want to make her cry? It had never been his intention. He hadn’t meant to corner her; he’d only wanted to have fun. Daykin couldn’t ignore the sight of Ailee’s reddened cheek and palm, her eyes swollen with tears. He was certain she hadn’t done anything wrong. Even if she had, was this the right way to handle it?
“Get out! Just get out!”
Daykin couldn’t obey her order to leave. Her cries sounded less like she wanted him gone and more like a desperate plea for rescue. Pushed back by Ailee’s force, Daykin landed on the floor. He gently pulled her into his arms. She struggled briefly, then subsided, quietly sobbing against his chest.
“There’s something I haven’t told you. I’m… I’m powerless. I’m nothing. You said I didn’t do anything wrong, but…”
“What does that matter? It’s not your fault.”
Daykin paused, considering. Would he still have wanted to be friends with Ailee, even if she were powerless and couldn’t have stopped his… outbursts? He wasn’t entirely sure, but he concluded that yes, he probably would have. More than that, he was sure he would have.
‘How could anyone ignore someone as enchanting as her?’ Everyone else was blind, fools. Idiots who had thrown their brains out the window. They might as well use their optic nerves to embroider if that’s all they were good for.
Ailee’s tears flowed afresh at Daykin’s comforting words and touch. ‘It’s not my fault I was born this way.’ She’d never thought of it that way before, but somehow, she realized she’d been longing to hear those words. It was strange. She’d never even considered the thought, yet she’d been yearning for it all this time.
Daykin continued to gently pat Ailee’s back as he quietly confessed his own secret.
