The Abandoned and Terminally Ill Lady Married a Monster - Chapter 48
Chapter 48
I had taken the medicine for so long that there was no cure, no treatment. Well, not entirely. I had heard of a possible remedy in a distant land, but it was too outlandish to consider. ‘But I can’t tell him any of this.’ Shame washed over me. It was agonizing to lay bare my vulnerabilities. ‘So, the reason for the divorce… I’ll just say I can’t have children. That I can’t be a burden to him. It’s not entirely untrue.’
I would be dead long before I could bear children. Perhaps the medicine’s side effects had already rendered me infertile. I still had my monthly cycle, but the side effects could have affected my reproductive organs.
‘Kin said he came to rescue me, but he also needs a wife who can provide an heir.’
‘And he’s a Duke.’
A man of his standing would surely prioritize an heir. ‘I should prepare to return home.’ I hadn’t brought anything with me, so there wasn’t much to prepare, but I needed to steel myself. Once I returned, I would likely never see this sky again. Back at the estate, I would simply carry out the plan I had failed to execute yesterday. Then my suffering would finally end. I pressed down the bittersweet feeling in my chest, trying to regain my composure.
—Knock, knock. The sound of knocking pulled me from my thoughts.
“My lady, it’s Helen, the maid.”
“Come in.”
‘What is it? Is she here to tidy the bedchamber? Or to remind me of my duties as the Duchess?’ If I were the daughter of a typical noble family, I might have had some inkling, and I wouldn’t be so bewildered. Unfortunately, I was a noble in name only. Inside, I was no different from a commoner, clueless about the intricacies of aristocratic life.
Helen announced her purpose in a cheerful voice, “My lady, Lady Minerva requests your presence. I’ll assist you with your preparations.”
Lady Minerva? Kin’s mother… I didn’t know any aristocratic names, but before the wedding, my mother had tossed me a piece of paper with the names of the Duke’s family members, insisting I memorize them.
‘I’ve decided to ask for a divorce, but it’s only the first day, and I haven’t even greeted her. Even if I’m leaving soon, I’ve probably made a terrible first impression.’
In my defense, I hadn’t been taught much about aristocratic society. No one had explained the wedding procedures or how I was supposed to conduct myself afterward. I might be ignorant of many things, but I knew I should have paid my respects to my mother-in-law. And I knew, with a sinking feeling, that I had failed spectacularly. Even if I wouldn’t be staying long, the thought of earning her disapproval made my chest tighten. I would never get used to being disliked. Sighing inwardly, I replied, “Thank you.”
“Certainly, my lady. I’ll do my best.”
‘There’s no need to do your best.’
With a gentle smile, Helen began to bustle around efficiently.
“My lady, I mentioned it yesterday, but you have such lovely skin.”
Having finished applying light makeup, Helen gazed at my skin with an almost unsettling intensity. ‘That’s strange. The maids at the estate always criticized my complexion.’ Either the maids at the estate had lied, or Helen was lying now. I looked at my unremarkable skin. It seemed Helen was the one being dishonest.
‘Flattery won’t get you anywhere. I’ll be leaving soon.’
Unlike the maids at the estate, who seemed to relish pointing out my flaws, Helen treated me with gentle kindness. That kindness was a burden. I had yearned for such warmth, but the reality was different from what I had imagined. I was nothing, a fleeting presence, unworthy of such treatment. It felt like wearing clothes that didn’t fit. Seeing Helen’s efforts to please me made me feel guilty. Why was she being so kind? We had only known each other for two days.
“My lady, you truly look like a fairy. Forgive me if I’m being presumptuous, but you’re so ethereal…” Helen clasped her hands together, her voice full of admiration. Unable to bear her gaze, I changed the subject.
“Um, well… I think Lady Minerva might be waiting…”
“Oh, of course. Right this way, my lady.”
Helen opened the door with a flourish, a satisfied smile on her face. ‘Is everyone in this family so strong?’ I followed Helen, trying to quell my nerves. Meeting someone of my parents’ generation always made me anxious.
I hadn’t interacted with many people, but I was particularly flustered around servants who were the same age as my parents. My heart would race, and sometimes my chin would tremble uncontrollably. Kin’s mother was unlikely to approve of me, but I didn’t want to appear completely overwhelmed, even if we were parting ways soon.
