The Guide Played Her Role as a Stand-in a Little Too Well - Chapter 20
“Whether you’re a guide or not, do you even realize that I’m still in a state of awakening where I haven’t even become a guide yet?”
His tone was like speaking to a child in kindergarten, and my face flushed with heat.
‘No, I do know that!’
“But I haven’t properly learned guiding. It seems like the Duke has no intention of teaching me properly either.”
I hadn’t thought about guiding when making the contract; I had only considered the future.
Working as a guide will often occur if I was in the guise of a stand-in.
The more you know, the more difficult it becomes to control.
From Duke Apharantes’ perspective, it would be best if I knew as little as possible. But unless I understood the Duke’s intentions, I couldn’t just stay silent.
‘Thankfully, I can keep an eye on the Duke in front of Hedonia.’
“Wasn’t meeting Esban today for guiding purposes?”
I nodded.
“It seemed like today’s meeting was to get to know each other’s faces. Of course, the guiding part… I can’t deny that it didn’t happen.”
“Why the silence in between?”
“We were holding hands, but I’m not sure if guiding was done properly.”
Hedonia’s eyes widened at my words.
“Quite boldly, you held hands. Considering your obsessive attention to status,”
Hedonia seemed more surprised by the fact that I held hands with Esban rather than the fact that I hadn’t guided before.
I shrugged.
I was too tired to refuse…! It was a similar reaction.
“Since you still can’t feel your own body properly, it’s best to observe the other’s expressions and changes.”
Hedonia’s words were unexpectedly kind and detailed.
“Since you didn’t actively guide, it might not have been a perfect guiding, but there could have been unconscious guiding happening through the contact itself.”
What I did seemed to be unconsciously guiding.
‘Certainly, I felt drained.”’
The sudden onset of fatigue, even the act of taking a nap, was out of character for me.
“Exactly.”
Nodding in agreement, I felt the gaze and lifted my head.
Suddenly, I found the eyes staring at me quite beautiful.
“Come here.”
Hedonia beckoned me with a flick of his hand.
As if there were magnets attached to his fingertips, I was irresistibly drawn to him.
“Guiding is divided into two methods.”
“…Two methods?”
He slightly distanced himself from me.
“Non-contact guiding, which can be done without physical contact, even when we’re this close.”
His neutral voice carried a mesmerizing power as soon as it reached my ears.
“…And?”
Holding my hand over his, Hedonia brushed aside the stray hair fallen over his forehead.
“Contact guiding, which unfolds when we make contact.”
His fingers, covering my hand with their sturdy structure, left little doubt about the presence of a skeleton underneath the flesh, making it hard to imagine him as anything other than a being tormented by awakening pain, reduced to nothing but bones.
Every nerve in my body seemed to converge at the point of contact with his hand.
As I lifted my head slightly, I caught sight of his dense, fluttering eyelashes. Beneath the golden lashes, his eyes sparkled like topazes.
The platinum blonde hair tousled between our faces was intricately woven, resembling finely crafted threads.
A spring breeze seemed to blow through the empty room, and the surrounding air felt distinctly different.
The sound of my heartbeat echoed loudly.
I felt moved by the beauty.
‘This method tends to be more efficient,’
Although it was completely different from the first time I saw him, this side seemed closer to his true self.
‘Such a gentle person,’
I thought, even now.
Rather than feeling jealous of me taking on his role, he seemed to be guiding me in this way.
…Of course, this side would be more advantageous for him as well.
Suddenly realizing this fact, I widened my eyes.
‘I shouldn’t be deceived by the first impression,’
Hedonia always held the position to utilize me whenever necessary. He must have realized the importance of building rapport with me.
To avoid being merely used after the Duke, I needed to stay alert. I sensed from our first meeting that Hedonia wasn’t just a kind person.
Hedonia narrowed his eyes as he looked at me.
“What are you thinking about?”
He caught me off guard in my distracted state, irritably brushing back his hair.
“I don’t repeat myself. Even if you’re my benefactors aiding my awakening”.
“I’m really focusing,”
I hurriedly nodded.
My words softened Hedonia’s sharp gaze.
Only then did his hand release mine, but where his touch lingered, warmth still remained.
Even though his touch had faded, it felt like it lingered, imprinting on my skin.
‘I didn’t realize it was this intense during my time with Esban,’
I thought to myself. It was at this moment that the true significance of guiding hit me once again.
To engage in contact guiding, I needed to maintain a close physical connection with the other person.
And not just once, but repeatedly.
This was the life of a guide.