The Guide Played Her Role as a Stand-in a Little Too Well - Chapter 61
His lips lingered at the same spot for a long while before finally parting.
After leaving his mark on me for a persistently long time.
The gaze Hedonia cast my way was intense.
I absently touched the area of my neck where his lips had been.
I couldn’t just look into Hedonia’s eyes.
It was too embarrassing.
In contrast to me, Hedonia appeared completely unfazed.
His eyes, much clearer now that the pain seemed gone, were definitely different from before.
The atmosphere teetered on a delicate boundary.
It wouldn’t be strange to tilt either way, between reason and emotion.
A tension that could bloom between a man and a woman.
Hedonia seemed about to cross that line any moment.
“Karina.”
Clunk.
The moment Hedonia uttered my name, the carriage stopped.
We had arrived.
“We’re here! Let’s go in quickly, Lady Hedonia.”
Unable to bear the air any longer, I quickly got up from my seat.
Hedonia, who had been staring at me intently, raised an eyebrow.
“…Yes, let’s go inside.”
It was better this way… Otherwise, the Duke would have knocked on the door, urging us out.
“Yes.”
I exhaled a breath of relief and reached for the carriage door handle when Hedonia calmly said from the front,
“To my room.”
“What?”
Maybe it was because of what had just happened. I reacted strongly to Hedonia’s words.
At my response, Hedonia chuckled lightly and then glanced at me as if wondering what I was thinking.
“We must finish the treatment.”
“Ah, yes.”
…Why did the suggestion to go to his room sound like it had another meaning?
Could it be that the lecherous demon inside me had awakened?
I shook my head vigorously, my eyes wide open.
Let’s not think about anything else.
The physical contact with Hedonia isn’t about affection, it’s just part of the job.
Just like with other Espers.
Touching each other, kissing, or being intimate doesn’t guarantee a rational relationship between the two.
‘But it won’t be easy.’
I could see why Duke Apharantes preferred non-contact guidance.
Perhaps to minimize variables and fulfill his duties as a guide.
To not deviate from the defined roles of Esper and guide.
* * *
Back in the room, I was quickly led to Hedonia’s room following the duke’s order.
My appearance, unchanged and in dirty clothes, contrasted sharply with his freshly changed clean attire.
Hedonia, sitting on the bed, still looked pale.
It seemed pitiful that someone in a completely different situation from mine looked so vulnerable… Or was that just my arrogance?
Thinking about how our situations might reverse later troubled my heart.
‘…Let’s not think too deeply about it.’
It’s foolish to worry about things that haven’t happened yet.
Worrying won’t change my actions right now.
I will do what I can, wherever I am.
Even if I don’t know where it will lead me.
I raised the cup, and as my finger touched it, blood began to fill it.
I was momentarily lost, waiting for the cup to fill, but soon the earlier scene kept replaying in my mind. I shook my head several times to clear the afterimage.
The cup was now full of red blood.
“Here it is.”
“Karina.”
“Yes.”
“Refrain from contact guidance until you are fully accustomed to it.”
He was not concerned about his own condition but mine.
How compassionate he is.
Let’s never forget, Hedonia’s actions are not self-serving.
“Look after yourself first, Lady Hedonia.”
As I pursed my lips and glanced toward the wine cup, Hedonia slightly frowned.
He fluttered his lips momentarily.
As if choosing his words.
Hedonia hesitated, then looked at me and asked,
“Do I… seem like someone you need to take care of?”
It was a dangerous question, like stepping on a landmine.
It felt like he was asking if I pitied him.
‘What should I say?’
I was in a state of panic.
Because Hedonia had read my inner thoughts.
If I said yes, it would undoubtedly upset him.
I knew it would hurt his pride.
‘How can I respond without hurting Hedonia?’
Reluctantly, I searched for words to reply.
But no answer was necessary.
“…I see.”
I had forgotten.
Sometimes, silence is a clearer answer than words.
Our eyes met as I hastily raised my head.
Hedonia’s pupils shook as he gripped the cup tightly in his hand.
His face, as he was biting his lips, turned red.
It was a disturbance unlike any I had seen in him before.
“…Lady Hedonia.”
“Leave.”
Never during our time together had he looked so close to tears.
He seemed like a completely different person from the one who had kissed me and left his mark on my neck.
I remembered the fierce look he had when we first met. The emotions filling his eyes seemed like a dam about to burst.
“…The treatment is over. Leave.”
I wanted to say I was sorry.
But I could acutely feel that even that phrase would wound him.
‘You know it’s not just that.’
“But, Lady Hedonia.”
I felt that I would regret it if I left things this way. There was something left that I needed to tell him.